The Mind the Mouth and the Pen

 My tongue almost never matches my mind. It’s the honest frustrating truth. But luckily sometimes the pen can.

For a lot of people who know me. That may be a bit or surprise. I’m sorry extroverted. I can make small talk easily. But I often just feel misunderstood.

I have this thing where I feel like I can’t quite capture and express my thoughts as well verbally as they are in my head. I know I’m not alone with my his struggle. 

Slowing down my brain with paper helps me develop the clarity None of us like to be tripping over words or to be fumbling around to express ourselves. But if often happens. I know my mind and my mouth get in a ridiculous race with each other. Taking it to my fingers eliminates that competition. 

It allows for more processing and contemplation. A more completeness in my ideas. That doesn’t say I entirely ignore racing ahead to jot a note for something I want to say later, but it allows me to process the task more completely. As a really visually focused learner it’s nice to take the time to put my own thoughts into something physically tangible and visible. The focus and depth that gives to the expression of my thoughts is incredible. 

There’s another thing that is helped with writing. I can regulate my emotions better. The physical act is calming. On projects I care about the tactile sensation of a pen on paper helps guide me into a more restful and focused mindset. The tactile feedback of a keyboard helps but it isn’t quite the same. There’s something about engaging that allows me to not suppress my emotions but to understand and engage with them better. Speaking and it’s direct connection lends itself to being more emotional. And the regulation goes out the window. As someone who wants to be understood, who wants to express things properly, that can be the worst part. Writing helps so much with that.

See I think a lot of times in conversation people feel attacked or threatened. Chances that learn are addressed as debates to be won or lost. That’s not unique to physical conversation. The rapidity of social media posts and comments lends itself to that dynamic as well. There’s something that a more long form written response can address. We need to dig deeper into what we’re trying to express. Demonstrate our thoughts more fully.

Writing allows that. Especially for me. It’s not just an expressive outlet but a vital means of processing and expressing my thoughts, needs, and at times hopes and dreams. 

I hope I don’t sound crazy, I hope I’m not alone. But it’s so much easier to write than speak so much.