Has there even been a thought?

People think about things that effect them first. And the amount of interaction they have with an issue is directly correlated to how much they contemplate it. Because of that I think it's easy for people who are part of the LBTQIA+ community to forget that there are those who never questioned their sexuality or gender identity. 

For some of us navigating complex emotional and identity crises is part of existing in a heteronormative culture. We find ourselves analyzing how we fit in society. But it's a unique experience to us. 

For the majority of the population that just didn't happen. It doesn't cross their minds. They're straight. They're a man or a woman. They just exist in the world. Unless you experience something different, or care deeply about someone who experiences something different it's just an abstract. It's not something to worry about. 

There's something to say about life and thoughts just going on. There is no motivation to do so and we need to recognize that. People live their life and focus on their needs and the needs of those they love. Beyond that there isn't much thought. And that's ok. The gulf of ignorance is much broader than the drive of malice.

Now I'm not saying that there are not prejudiced people in this work. Heaven knows there are. But the majority of people are not. 

There's a fairly established theory in psychology that prejudice can be overcome by exposure to people who belong to groups that we hold stereotypes of and prejudice for. I can think of so many examples of this in my life. But it's the crux.

As our society self sorts we are actually seeing less interfacing between people with varying viewpoints and experiences. We sort based on race, religion, political ideology, and occupation. And it means we have gulfs in our experience when it comes to meeting people. 

I know that my own experience and expectations of people have changed based on the people I've met. I've had the absolute privilege of living around the country is various regions and states with their varied demographics. And the fact I was able to have that experience both as a missionary and as a soldier varied that experience even more. 

The thing I found was the majority of people aren't evil. They aren't malicious. They just haven't had to think about something before.

That's why representation is important. That's why standing up and being an example are important. It starts the dialogue. It causes a thought process to happen that wouldn't have. In person conversations and relationships are more effective and longer lasting than media portrayals. It's the only way to bring people together. I mean that sincerely. 

That leads me to this. Once exposed, pushback is where you can see malice. If someone goes from never thinking about something, to not knowing anyone who thinks differently; meets someone and still has prejudice and stereotypes. That's the problem. 

We need to see the nuance between someone who hasn't thought of a different view before and the person who is harmful after learning something new.